Sunday

What a blessing today was. Church was wonderful with wonderful speakers, teachers, and students. 

In Sacrament meeting Seb, Melissa, and Levi spoke. It was Levi's homecoming and the topics were obedience and patience. 

I taught Ethan's Sunday School class, and was not as prepared as I should have been (I'll be better next week!;)). It was fun to be in class with Ethan, to get to see how his class interacts, and how he answers questions. As class was winding down he somehow got his middle finger stuck in his phone case. We had to have a quick closing prayer so we could head to the kitchen to see how to get it off! HA Thankfully there was a bowl full of butter so after a few minutes we were able to get his finger free! Never a dull moment with Ethan around!

While in RS we discussed  "The Sacred Callings of Fathers and Mothers" out of the Ezra Taft Benson manual. It was a lovely inspired lesson, and the comments from the women in the ward as they shared their experiences were profound to me. We spent most of the lesson discussing his lists of 10 specific ways fathers and mothers can effectively parent.

Fathers:

1. Give father’s blessings to your children. Baptize and confirm your children. Ordain your sons to the priesthood. These will become spiritual highlights in the lives of your children.

2. Personally direct family prayers, daily scripture reading, and weekly family home evenings. Your personal involvement will show your children how important these activities really are.

3. Whenever possible, attend Church meetings together as a family. Family worship under your leadership is vital to your children’s spiritual welfare.

4. Go on daddy-daughter dates and father-and-sons’ outings with your children. …

5. Build traditions of family vacations and trips and outings. These memories will never be forgotten by your children.

6. Have regular one-on-one visits with your children. Let them talk about what they would like to. Teach them gospel principles. Teach them true values. Tell them you love them. Personal time with your children tells them where Dad puts his priorities.

7. Teach your children to work, and show them the value of working toward a worthy goal.

8. Encourage good music and art and literature in your homes. Homes that have a spirit of refinement and beauty will bless the lives of your children forever.

9. As distances allow, regularly attend the temple with your wife. Your children will then better understand the importance of temple marriage and temple vows and the eternal family unit.

10. Have your children see your joy and satisfaction in service to the Church. This can become contagious to them, so they, too, will want to serve in the Church and will love the kingdom.

Mothers:

[First,] whenever possible, be at the crossroads when your children are either coming or going—when they leave and return from school, when they leave or return from dates, when they bring friends home. Be there at the crossroads whether your children are 6 or 16. …

Second, mothers, take time to be a real friend to your children. Listen to your children, really listen. Talk with them, laugh and joke with them, sing with them, play with them, cry with them, hug them, honestly praise them. Yes, regularly spend one-on-one time with each child. Be a real friend to your children.

Third, take time to read to your children. Starting from the cradle, read to your sons and daughters. … You will plant a love for good literature and a real love for the scriptures if you will read to your children regularly.

Fourth, take time to pray with your children. Family prayers, under the direction of the father, should be held morning and night. Have your children feel of your faith as you call down the blessings of heaven upon them. … Have your children participate in family and personal prayers, and rejoice in their sweet utterances to their Father in Heaven.

Fifth, take time to have a meaningful weekly home evening. Have your children actively involved. Teach them correct principles. Make this one of your family traditions. …

Sixth, take time to be together at mealtimes as often as possible. This is a challenge as the children get older and lives get busier. But happy conversation, sharing of the day’s plans and activities, and special teaching moments occur at mealtime because parents and children work at it.

Seventh, take time daily to read the scriptures together as a family. … Reading the Book of Mormon together as a family will especially bring increased spirituality into your home and will give both parents and children the power to resist temptation and to have the Holy Ghostas their constant companion. I promise you that the Book of Mormon will change the lives of your family.

Eighth, take time to do things as a family. Make family outings and picnics and birthday celebrations and trips special times and memory builders. Whenever possible, attend, as a family, events where one of the family members is involved, such as a school play, a ball game, a talk, a recital. Attend Church meetings together, and sit together as a family when you can. Mothers who help families pray and play together will [help them] stay together and will bless children’s lives forever.

Ninth, mothers, take time to teach your children. Catch the teaching moments at mealtime, in casual settings, or at special sit-down times together, at the foot of the bed at the end of the day, or during an early-morning walk together. …

A mother’s love and prayerful concern for her children are the most important ingredients in teaching her own. Teach children gospel principles. Teach them it pays to be good. Teach them there is no safety in sin. Teach them a love for the gospel of Jesus Christ and a testimony of its divinity.

Teach your sons and daughters modesty, and teach them to respect manhood and womanhood. Teach your children sexual purity, proper dating standards, temple marriage, missionary service, and the importance of accepting and magnifying Church callings.

Teach them a love for work and the value of a good education.

Teach them the importance of the right kind of entertainment, including appropriate movies, videos, music, books, and magazines. Discuss the evils of pornography and drugs, and teach them the value of living the clean life.

Yes, mothers, teach your children the gospel in your own home, at your own fireside. This is the most effective teaching that your children will ever receive. …

Tenth and finally, mothers, take the time to truly love your little children. A mother’s unqualified love approaches Christlike love.

Your teenage children also need that same kind of love and attention. It seems easier for many mothers and fathers to express their love to their children when they are young, but more difficult when they are older. Work at this prayerfully. There need be no generation gap. And the key is love. Our young people need love and attention, not indulgence. They need empathy and understanding, not indifference from mothers and fathers. They need the parents’ time. A mother’s kindly teachings and her love for and confidence in a teenage son or daughter can literally save them from a wicked world.

I absolutely love all of these ideas and suggestions. It is always nice to see things you are doing in addition to the things you can add to be better. During the discussion Laurie Long shared that when her children were growing up Ed had monthly "PPI's" with the children and they called them their "blue chair discussions." Each month Ed and Laurie would sit together to discuss their children individually, then Laurie would leave the room and Ed would call them in one by one. This idea immediately resonated with me. What a blessing to have the spirit so strong in the room. I know that Laurie was prompted to share that and I KNOW I needed to hear it. So this evening Brian and I discussed Ethan and Olivia and Brian was able to have great one on one time with them. We started a little late in the evening to get through all the children, but it was in immediate answer for our family. Lately I've been noticing Ethan apprehensions about junior high school, and my attempts to bring it up were turning up fruitless. But Brian and Ethan were able to have a wonderful conversation about that and so much more. It didn't occur to me on my own to go this route, but my Father in Heaven knew better. It calmed my mothers heart as well as my 12 years heart about all the unknowns that are coming our way!

Toward the end of the lesson Linda Johnson made a wonderful comment about not worrying about or waiting for perfection in the things we are trying to achieve as mothers. She shared that although the ideal is to have the WHOLE family together for scriptures, family meals, etc it is better to do it with who is there then to forgo doing it all together. I feel like I struggle with this so very much. I want things to be perfect and as a result I tend to put things off until they are "ready" instead of going ahead with what I have or who is around. I need to focus on making constant (consistent) efforts instead of waiting for perfect moments that never really come anyways. 

We ended the day playing Hide-and-Seek in the dark as a whole family. We all had such a great time. It was a last minute unplanned thing. I thought of it and then just did it! It is a baby step, but I will prayerful work harder to find fun, and uncomplicated things for us to do together to enjoy each others company! 

It was a "perfect" Sunday!